You know, the very best piece of parenting advice that I ever got, came from my dentist. It was around my son’s first birthday, when I took him in to get his first dentist check-up. And we were having a discussion about how the best way to brush his teeth, and what I need to be careful about.

I said to him, “You know, oh he just hates getting his teeth brushed. He fights me on it, and you know, I have to be honest, most days I kinda skip it, or I don’t do a very good job, because he hates it so much.”

And my dentist just stared at me for a few minutes with a look of what I thought was concern. And then he said, “So what.”

Two little words. So what.

And it really changed my whole perspective on my job as a parent. What those two little words taught me was, that it doesn’t matter that he’s upset. Right? I mean, I can validate the fact that he doesn’t enjoy getting his teeth brushed, and I can help him learn to accept the fact that this is happening anyway.

So I wanna give you a tip today, and hopefully this will solve some of your little battles. Brushing teeth has to be non-negotiable. Right? You have to brush your teeth in order for them to stay healthy. So what I started doing with my son, was asking him if he wanted to do it the easy way or the hard way.

And at first I was very clear about what the easy way looked like. First, mommy does it, then Charlie can do it. Or then Angus can do it. And they can have a turn. ‘Cause most kids really like, kinda like to play with that toothbrush, and chew on it a little bit. But first, I need to get in there and do a good job.

So that’s the easy way. I do my job, you do your job, we’re all happy, no problems.

The hard way, on the other hand is, you don’t open your mouth, you don’t cooperate. Mommy has to hold you, by the chin, and stick that toothbrush in there, and do the job while you cry and you’re upset. That’s the hard way.

Doesn’t matter which way you choose, because we’re doing it anyway.

Now over time, he began to understand the difference, between the easy way and the hard way. And eventually, all I had to say was, “Do you want to do this the easy way or the hard way?” And he would say, “The easy way.” Or he would open his mouth and let me do it. And that solved our problem.

I had a similar experience with sunscreen. And sunscreen had to also be non-negotiable. We’re doing it the easy way, where I have to hold you while you wiggle around, you’re unhappy. Or you just stand nicely for a minute or two, while I do the sunscreen, and we’re done.

So I want you to take that to heart. There are things in this life that have to be non-negotiable. Brushing your teeth, getting sunscreen on, going to bed on time and sleeping well. In my opinion those are the three very strong non-negotiables in our house. And it is okay if your child gets upset about that.

And just start giving them the option, should we do this the easy way, or the hard way.

This can work with getting out of the bathtub too. Do you want to get out of the bathtub the easy way, or the hard way? And eventually your child will understand that you mean business, and you’re going to do it anyway. Right? You’re not gonna back down. And it just makes sense to cooperate.

Do it the easy way, who doesn’t like to do things the easy way?

Thanks so much for watching today. Sleep well.