Hi, I’m Dana. Welcome to this week’s video. Today I want to talk a little bit about the differences between babies. That seems pretty common sense, babies are all different, but I think what happens sometimes especially if you’ve been looking online and you’ve been reading the testimonials on the website, it’s easy to start thinking that this is a quick fix in a day or two. For some babies it is and that’s awesome.

I get letters from people all the time saying that it only took two nights. I’ve even had letter from people that said it only took one night. That’s great but that’s not going to be every baby. You should consider yourself really lucky if it only took you a night to get your baby sleeping better. That’s usually a sign that that particular baby was so ready for this. They were so ready to find their own skills for sleeping well that as soon as you showed them the way, off they went and became superstar sleepers really quickly. That can happen and it does, but I want you to keep in mind that babies are all different.

If your baby takes more like five nights or seven nights before you get a full night of sleep, that is totally normal. There’s a realm of normal in this. I don’t want you to panic or start to second guess yourself if this isn’t happening like magic. It’s a skill set. Learning to sleep well is a skill. I will argue that to my dying day, it is a skill and a skill takes time to learn. If I’m teaching my children to read or ride a bike or swim, I’m not expecting them to have this mastered after one day, one session in the pool now you’re ready for the Olympics. No, right? That doesn’t make any kind of sense. Some days are going to go better than others, especially in the reading experience.

I was a teacher and I had three kids of my own, some days if they’re well rested and everything’s going right, they would read really well and the next day not so good. It would roller coaster like that until they had the skill mastered. You might find that that’s the case with this skill as well, that you have a few good nights, then a bit of back step, then a few more good nights and a bit of a back step. That’s really, really common. I think in our minds we think, “Night one will be bad. Night two will be a little bit better. Night three will be a little bit better,” and so on and so on and so on. Again, sometimes that’s exactly the way it goes but sometimes it’s not. You need to keep that in mind

Another thing to consider is how bad the situation was when you came in. I’ve had clients where, I can think of a worse case scenario where this baby was up, I kid you not, every twenty minutes all night long. Obviously they were bed sharing because how else would this work? Every twenty minutes there was a wake up and baby was eating and mom was awake. This was going on and on all night long. That’s a pretty extreme case. Knowing that going in you have to monitor your expectations. That’s pretty bad and so it’s most likely going to take a little longer to get to success with that particular baby.

Have a look at how things were before you started, even keep a little journal or write down your notes before you start the program of, “Okay we are on average up eight times a night with this baby.” That will give you some perspective going into the plan, that this is going to be a little harder of a road, a bit bigger of a hill for you guys to climb because of the situation prior. Again not impossible, worth doing? Absolutely, it’s not good for anyone being up eight times a night. Keeping that in mind and keeping your expectations in check. If it’s making you feel bad to read everybody saying their baby slept after night one then stop reading those things and remind yourself that this is your journey, this is your baby. Every baby’s unique and different and they’re going to have different reactions to this. It’s all within the realm of normal and it’s all just fine.

A couple of other indicators that it might be a little rougher for you would be reflux and a past experience of colic. I find that babies who had colic as a newborn tend to have a little bit deeper of a sleep prop association and there’s often more sleep props involved. There’s the primary one and then there’s a couple of other secondary, third ones in the wing there. I find that if they’ve got lots of different props it can be a little bit more challenging to get the baby sleeping well and teach them the skills they need.

Reflux, same thing. My suggestion is wait until you feel like the reflux is under control and managed, and then stat the Sleep Sense program, knowing that I have found after thirteen in this business that babies who had or have reflux tend to be a little bit harder to sleep train. Meaning that it’s going to take a bit longer, there might be a bit more protest than your best friend next door with her little one, but again all within the realm of normal, keeping your expectations manageable and fair given the circumstance. Thanks so much for watching today. Sleep well.